After All This Time

by Nicky Haldenby

supported by
/
  • Streaming + Download

    Includes high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more. Paying supporters also get unlimited streaming via the free Bandcamp app.
    Purchasable with gift card

      name your price

     

  • Compact Disc (CD) + Digital Album

    Exclusive limited edition CD version of the album, with artwork designed by Nicky and other exclusive downloadable extras.

    Includes unlimited streaming of After All This Time via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
    ships out within 2 days

      £6 GBP or more 

     

1.
Lose It All 04:53
This time I fucked up, I didn't mean to I ran out of things to say, I didn't want to But I want you more than that, I think I want you more Maybe your silent thoughts make all the noise I'm hearing Maybe I need your voice to fill the gaps I'm feeling I'm feeling it all tonight, I'm feeling it all It's like we've been saying nothing after all this time I don't know how but now somehow it feels like we've lost it all But I don't want to lose you, I don't want to lose it all. It's like I've swum across the seas to burn my bridges With my words like gasoline upon the edges and the spaces between us now There's such a long long way Say the words Say the words on your lips Give me more than the grasp of your fingertips Let me know what you think when you say what you say
2.
Tightrope 03:30
I'm walking over cityscapes, I'm striding over stars I'm teetering upon the brink of falling in your arms It's such a long way down without a hand to hold It's such a long way Will you walk this tightrope with me? Or will you stand back and watch me fall? If I lose grip would you find it? Or will you stand back and watch it all unfold? Cos it's such a long way, It's such a long way down I walk among the atmosphere, I stumble on the moon But focussing upon my steps I can't soak up the view You tell me to look around but my feet aren't on the ground And it's such a long way down Will you walk this tightrope with me? Or will you stand back and watch me fall? If I lose grip will you find it? Or will you stand back and watch it all unfold? Cos it's such a long way, It's such a long way down From up on this tightrope, it's such a long way, It's such a long way down.
3.
Yours & Mine 04:37
Tell me all your future plans Your fears, your dreams, your hopes Tell me who your idol is and how to win your trust Tell me all the stories from when you went wrong I wanna hear them all Take me to the house and to the place where you grew up Show me that street corner where your heart first got broke Tell me all your favourite songs when you were young I wanna know it all Tell me everything until there's nothing I don't know We'll make these walls our house and turn our house into a home In time, we'll call it yours and mine I'll share with you my secrets and the things nobody knows I'll show you all the songs I wrote when I was eight years old And I believed in love But now I'm not so sure I'll pull out a ring when there is nothing we don't know I'll let you in these walls, you can make this heart your home In time, we'll call it yours and mine
4.
For You 03:12
Tell me where did I go wrong? Maybe I just said too much Was I not good enough? Cos I'm never good enough at all I wouldn't wanna change you I want you just the way you are I'd do anything to have you I'd move the moon and the stars But this world's working against us And the stars are falling down If only I could change the world, I'd change the world somehow for you Tell me how we fell apart? A shot in the dark that went two steps too far Now it's gone and broke my heart And it's broken in the dark somewhere I wouldn't wanna change you I want you just the way you are There was magic in the words you said And lifetimes in your eyes But this world's working against us And I can't turn back time If only I could start again, I'd stop the world and start again for you. I'd do it all again for you. Tell me why you changed your mind? When I was waiting I got left behind Was I not good enough? I'm never good enough at all.
5.
Assassins 03:47
I found a cassette and put it in a machine I heard your old voice talking right back at me An echo of the past where innocence could last And the ghosts we'd never see A ghostly apparition of our future condition Two assassins on a mission and there's only one way out of here I've got to get out of here. Why do you do this to me all the time? Why do you come and haunt me every night? I'm scared to stay awake or fall asleep These dreams are as bad as the nightmare I'm living in I found an old photo but I don't recognise me Put it on a shelf with a letter from a past me. All the things I wish I'd said sounded better in my head, And in my head is where they'll always stay A burning effigy of all the things we could've been But I'd written in it green and now it's bursting at the seams with jealousy I told you I was jealous, see? They told me don't let go, You'll be worse for it you know. But now I'm standing with a smoking gun And I watch the bullets run.
6.
Us 04:23
It's as easy as a hello, it's as hard as a goodbye It's the end of the end and the beginning of a start again It's an early spring bud in a late autumn wind It is just an ashen leaf caught up in a gale again It's in everything we say, it's in everything we do It's in our DNA to be who we are; to be me and you It's the light without the dark, it's the night without the stars It is just a shadow of our former selves But that is really all we are It's in everything we say, it's in everything we do It's in our DNA to be who we are; to be me and you And now you're telling me just when it was going right, You're sticking in your knife right through my heart And everything I say, I don't say it right You're either saying nothing or you say goodbye. It's a fire without a spark It's a heart without the guts It's the ashes on the floor From the burning memories of us.
7.
So here it comes, the final show The crowd comes out to watch us fall apart As I remember how I used to know you better. The circus days, the showtime nights The bitter lows and sparkling heights of us Still I remember how I used to know you better. You make me feel like a clown on a tightrope You make me feel like a mime when my heart is broke I've got to find a way out of your big top world. The illusion is dead, the magic is gone This house of cards, you used to call me home Do you remember how you used to know me better? So paint on your smile, juggle your lies, You're leaving this circus far behind, You found the Joker From Hell to mess with your mind. But still you make me feel like a clown on a tightrope You make me feel like a mime when my heart is broke I've got to find a way out of your big top world. It's a little too late for that now, just a little too late for that now, This show is over, there's no encore this time around. It's a little too late for that now, just a little too late for that now, Gone are the days when I was nothing but your circus clown. You made me feel like a clown on a tightrope. You made me feel like a mime when my heart was broke. And now it feels like you sabotaged me, Got what you wanted then kicked me where it hurts. And now you've kicked me right out of your big top world. You made me feel like a clown on a tightrope, so utterly worthless.
8.
I, I should've known better than this, Than getting hooked before one single solitary kiss with you. You should've known better than me, A broken-hearted fool looking for someone else to make feel incomplete. Now you've taken my love but you've given it up It's such a beautiful rush I guess I should've looked twice Now I'll never look back. It's such a beautiful rush when I'm here standing on the verge of a relapse, These feelings won't go back I'm numb and you know that I'm on the edge of darkness now I, I can't say I'm sorry for this You see, my conscience is clean and I know I made no mistakes But I, I could've run faster than this I could've made it out alive while I still had any fight left in me You could've told me you weren't lonely at all You could've helped me help you breaking my fall But it's all in my head, all the words that you said I must be wrong And all the stars, the stars are falling down on all this wasted time There's so much tainted time And it goes on Now you've blamed it all on me
9.
Strangers 04:49
My room smells like a fresh start but my head is just a mess I've got a bed full of thoughts about how I only did my best I've got my mind made up, my heart's not sure But there's no going back, I've got to run away from everything we had Pretend we're only strangers, like nothing really mattered here at all Pretend we're only strangers, but I'm not really over it at all It all seems pretty fucked up as I clear each trace of you And I'm waiting for the day when I'm caught up in something new I can't erase the past, can't get past this, can't get you off my mind And it seems to me like you've been doing fine So why can't I pretend we're only strangers? Like nothing really mattered here at all Pretend we're only strangers when I'm not really over it at all I wonder if you think of me, I wonder what you think I wonder if you'd look at me if you saw me on the street I hope you think the memories that we made were sometimes great Cos I know for me some things will never change Even though we're only strangers We're strangers now but there was a time when the world turned for you and I These scars run deep but I'll find a way to forget you in time And I'll pretend we're only strangers Like nothing really mattered here at all Pretend we're only strangers Just like I never loved you at all Like nothing really mattered here at all Like we're only.
10.
Everything got bent and broken It all turned black where once was golden rain Falling upon this hallowed earth The price we pay for our fall from grace We analyse all our best mistakes Hoping some day some good will finally come From when we were on top of the world. There's only so far you can fall If you ever really fall at all So save me from my good intentions I've been feeling disconnected I hope I will find myself someday Back on top of the world On top of the world again.
11.
I. I've made mistakes and got lost on my way I wouldn't have it any other way, I swear I'll never change And I. I'm always following the broken road The broken road that always leads me home And home where I feel safe But maybe next year I'll write my story in golden ink and silver lines Maybe next year I'll take the glory I'll live it all a thousand times Maybe next year, maybe next year I. Well I'd been running out of things to say Until the saints and sinners came my way And now I talk for days Maybe next year I'll live my whole life I'll live it good, I'll live it right Maybe next year Maybe next year starts tonight.

about

Nicky Haldenby returns with his fourth self-produced album, After All This Time. Written over the space of two and a half years, and recorded entirely live over the past two months, the new album is raw, honest and intimate.

“I really wanted to make something that felt a little bit different with this album, and I thought the best way of doing that was to present these songs as they were written. Just me, in my bedroom with my piano. There's no gimmicks, and it's not trying to be something it's not.”

credits

released December 15, 2017

license

all rights reserved

tags

about

Nicky Haldenby Scarborough, UK

Nicky Haldenby is a 24 year old singer-songwriter from Scarborough, England.

contact / help

Contact Nicky Haldenby

Streaming and
Download help

Shipping and returns

Redeem code

Report this album or account

If you like Nicky Haldenby, you may also like: